Hibernation
I wrote this essay five days before my mother died on Christmas morning. I was with her through her last hours and the moment of her death, a profound experience. I thank you so much for your comments as I have written about...
Life Goes On
We set out in the car and take the local route. Following the river, we pass through small cities and towns in various stages of development. Some, like mine, once abandoned or left in disrepair, now show signs of life, propagated by the many transplants from Brooklyn...
Blurry Vision
Blur (adjective) · make or become less clear or less distinct · a thing that can’t be seen or heard clearly I live in a blur these days; literally and figuratively. Figuratively, it comes from spending time with my mother. It’s often unclear what she can see and...
Working Disorder
“Work is the one thing you can count on. Everything else is fragile,” Lately, I’ve been feeling exhausted. When in this state it’s easier to get sucked into the mindless waste of time called too much social media and not always doing the things that are good for you...
The Secret Garden Diorama
“If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden. My mother has descended another level down the steep staircase that is dementia. These days it is uncertain she knows who I am, yet as...
Ethic of Care
Entering the cavernous industrial space situated a block from the Brooklyn waterfront, unlike other fashions shows I’ve attended, I’m greeted by tables groaning with woven baskets filled generously with bread, fresh vegetables, empanadas and a sweet cookie. There are...
Seven Year Itch
Last week the Accidental Icon Project turned seven. I can’t help but think of the term “seven-year itch” because I have one. The term, introduced in 1955 when I was two, came from a film based on a play starring Marilyn Monroe and Tom Ewell. In keeping with my...
Hurry Up and Slow Down
In recent weeks, I’ve been feeling like the work in our new house has been going so very slow. We are working our way from the outside in, getting the things that require pleasant weather to be done first. So we’re repairing our front stoop and walkway and putting in...
New/Old Summer Hair
This post is sponsored by Hair Biology, all thoughts, and opinions are my own. “The key issue here is that grey hair, natural or otherwise, is like a white blanket; everything shows.” Beth Minardi. This summer my hair is the longest it’s been since I was 40 years...
History Lessons
For all my readers who struggle with letting themselves have something they love I can never settle for accepting something, just as it is. I’m compelled to find out the “history” of it. I can’t seem to embrace or comprehend the person, place or thing unless I do. I...
The Person You Always Should Have Been
I always come back here with an apology for not writing. However, I’ve been doing a great deal of it. I finished a book proposal for a book I am calling, “How To Be Old” (you have all inspired me) and submitted 2 essays for a writing class I’ve been taking that...
If You Love Denim Jeans You Can Love Being Old: A Rose
I find it so interesting that while we endorse the idea that our denim jeans have a unique ability to gain character and value as they get older, fade and get used, we resist applying the same logic to the aging process of human beings. Why do we allow so many...
A Walk Into Town: A Bud
Today I took a walk into town. Somehow shorter than I thought it would be, I arrived in about 20 minutes. I dressed with a little more care, not the usual t-shirt, jeans and green Birkenstock garden clogs I’ve been wearing every day. I do jazz them up with...
How To Be Old
I’m very attracted to all things old right now. Houses, furniture, perennials, trees, clothes, and women writers. I’m looking to them in the hope they'll share some secrets they know about how to be old. They all seem so satisfied with their circumstances, yet they...
Servicing the Vehicle: How I’m Taking Care of My Body So It Can Take Me Wherever I Want to Go
This post is sponsored by P.volve. All thoughts and opinions are my own. The other day while hanging out in the kitchen discussing one of the many projects that need to get done for the house, Calvin remarked that my arms and legs looked leaner and my posture was much...
Morning Rituals and a Morning Room
During this first week of March, I’m thinking about morning rituals. I’m at my very best in the morning. I can sustain my attention, my mood is good unless the vestiges of a bad dream hang around my shoulders, a slight weight of something being not right draped around...
A New Old Car
We’ve been determined to minimize buying new and using recycled “things” as we restore and furnish our new old house. We’ve been doing a good job of it, except for one or two items. In all the new old things we’re purchasing and in our new old house, we find that...
Native Plants and This Time Rabbit Holes
Thank you for all the good wishes and tips I received after my last post. Words can’t describe the suffusion of warmth I felt as I read comment after comment. I feel so grateful, during these times, for the community we have created here of articulate, thoughtful,...